Help for the Journey
A six-week personal study for your journey from mourning to joy
This is a special part of this website that will guide you to sections of the Bible that are relevant to the emotions, worries, and questions you are dealing with right now. We like to think of the Bible as the “owner’s manual“ for life. It’s a place where you can get real-world answers for real-world problems, including the death of someone special.
We’ve prepared six weeks of material that can make a significant contribution to your healing process.
Make time each week to explore the material in this personal study section. You’ll find it can become a time to grow closer to God and find His help for the things going on in your life (no matter how difficult or painful!). The study is separated into six weeks, with five days of Scripture reflections, questions, and life applications. You might want to highlight or underline verses that are especially meaningful to you. This can help you find those verses again quickly.
Ask for help
A good way to begin your personal study time each day is with a simple prayer asking God to show you what He would like you to see during your study that day (can you imagine Him not answering that prayer?). You don’t have to use fancy words, just talk to God and ask for His help in understanding what you read.
All material © MCMXCIX, MMVI by Church Initiative. Permission granted to print a single copy for personal use only.
Six-week study
Help for the Journey: Week 1
Day 1: Why do I hurt so much?
For I am about to fall, and my pain is ever with me. Psalm 38:17
1. Describe your pain.
2. At what times does your pain feel the deepest?
1. The author of the above Bible verse is honestly expressing his emotions to God. Whom have you shared your emotions with?
2. Have you considered participating in a GriefShare grief support group? What thoughts do you have about grief support groups?*
* You may have concerns about attending a grief recovery support group, but we highly recommend you try it anyway. Make a commitment to visit a nearby GriefShare group for three weeks. After three weeks, the decision to continue is yours.
Day 2: Comfort for your grief
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Matthew 5:4
1. What kind of blessing do you think will come to the person who honestly mourns?
2. How can a person in mourning be comforted?
1. Are you allowing yourself to grieve? Why or why not?
2. Since the death of your loved one, what have you found comfort in?
Day 3: When you feel weak
Be merciful to me, O LORD, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief. Psalm 31:9
1. What areas of your life does grief affect?
2. In this Psalm, where did David (the author) go for help when he felt weak?
1. How is grief affecting you physically and emotionally?
2. How is grief affecting your relationships with others?
Day 4: God loves the brokenhearted
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18
1. What is the Lord’s response to those who are brokenhearted?
2. At what times do you feel closest to God?
1. When have you felt farthest away from God?
2. What do you think you need to be saved from?
Day 5: The peace of God
Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way. The Lord be with all of you. 2 Thessalonians 3:16
1. What is the source of peace?
2. In what circumstances will God give peace to you?
1. How has the process of grieving been different than you had expected?
2. How have others understood or misunderstood your grief?
Help for the Journey: Week 2
Day 1: How long will the pain last?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me? Psalm 13:2
1. What questions for God do you have about your grief?
2. How do you feel about being this open and honest in your complaints to God?
1. What concerns do you have about the length of time you will be grieving?
2. Describe how long you have actually been in the grieving process? (Note: If you’ve been stuffing down or otherwise avoiding your grief, you may not have started the grieving process yet.)
At a GriefShare group, you have the opportunity to share your feelings and concerns in a safe place and to learn more about the grieving process.
Day 2: Jesus understands suffering
He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. Like one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. Isaiah 53:3
1. According to the Bible verse above, what did Jesus face during his life on earth?
2. Which of the above experiences have you faced since the death of your loved one?
1. How is it comforting to know that Jesus was a “man of sorrows”?
2. How often do you tell Jesus about your sorrows?
3. Write a short prayer telling God the difficulties you are facing today.
Day 3: A place of rest
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28–30
1. Whom does Jesus invite to come to Him?
2. What can you expect to receive from Him (if you go to Him)?
1. Why do you need the rest and peace that He offers?
2. What holds you back from going to the Lord to receive help?
Day 4: Expressing your grief
[After King Saul, his son, and Israel’s army were defeated:] Then David and all the men with him took hold of their clothes and tore them. They mourned and wept and fasted till evening for Saul and his son Jonathan, and for the army of the LORD and the house of Israel, because they had fallen by the sword. 2 Samuel 1:11–12
1. What forms of mourning did David and his men engage in?
2. How does our culture grieve different from the way they did in ancient Israel?
1. Are others involved with you in your grieving? Why or why not?
2. How do you express your grief?
Day 5: Getting a handle on anger
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. Ephesians 4:26
1. What limit is there to your anger?
2. How has your anger led you to sin?
1. What are examples of healthy ways you can release your anger?
2. If you have hurt someone as a result of your anger, name anyone you may need to apologize to. Ask God to help you.
Help for the Journey: Week 3
Day 1: Do not lose heart
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:16–18
1. According to this Bible verse, what is the difference between the seen and unseen world?
2. What does it mean that the unseen world is eternal?
1. What practical things can you do to change your focus from the negatives of the here-and-now to the positives of eternity?
2. What does it mean to be renewed inwardly day by day?
GriefShare groups provide a support system of people who understand that you cannot just “get back to normal” or “move on with your life.” At GriefShare, you will find hope and strength to continue forward day by day and to face the future.
Day 2: Jesus understands suffering
See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. Hebrews 12:15
1. What are the effects of bitterness?
2. How does bitterness appear during grief?
1. How have you dealt with any bitterness you may be feeling?
2. How have you seen others becoming bitter? How did this affect you?
Day 3: Held in His love
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:35–39
1. How powerful is the love of God? Is there anything that can separate you from His love?
2. How can God’s love change you?
1. What are the greatest problems in your life?
2. How is God’s love greater than these problems?
3. Do you feel separated from God now? Take some time to examine your relationship with Him, and write your thoughts here.
Day 4: The Lord is my shepherd
The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. Psalm 23:1–4
1. What do the words of this Psalm mean to you?
2. What is the valley of the shadow of death?
3. What are the promises to you in this Scripture (Bible verse)?
1. How has the Lord led you?
2. How are you like a sheep in His pasture?
Day 5: You can trust God’s faithfulness
Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” Lamentations 3:22–24
1. What is new every morning?
2. How can you let the “why” questions be answered in God’s time?
1. How has God been faithful to you?
2. What feelings from the past do you need to let go?
3. Which of the “why” questions do you need to let go?
Help for the Journey: Week 4
Day 1: Freedom from condemnation
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9
1. If you fail, does God condemn you?
2. When you sin as a Christian, what should you do?
3. Do you believe you are “in Christ Jesus”? If you are not sure, review God, What Is Going On? material on the GriefShare website.
1. Do you feel that you are forgiven? Why or why not?
2. Do you feel guilty?* Does that feeling keep returning? What is its source?
* People who have not experienced the death of a loved one do not truly understand the feelings of guilt you may be experiencing (regardless of whether the guilt is false). At a GriefShare group you can learn about God’s offer of freedom, forgiveness, and love.
Day 2: A transformed sorrow
Then maidens will dance and be glad, young men and old as well. I will turn their mourning into gladness; I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow. Jeremiah 31:13
1. It may seem like your sorrow will last forever. How does this verse suggest something else?
2. What is God’s final goal for you?
1. How has your compassion grown through your suffering and grief?
2. How have you become more aware of the feelings of others?
Day 3: An invincible hope
Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep [die], or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. 1 Thessalonians 4:13
1. What kind of difference is there when you have hope during your grieving?
2. What does a Christian have to be hopeful about?
1. If you knew with certainty that you would see your loved one again someday, how would that change your grieving?
2. What are your hopes and dreams attached to?
3. If you are a Christian, how does your grief differ from people you know who aren’t Christians?*
* For more information about what it means to let God lead your life and to learn what there is to be hopeful about, visit God, What Is Going On?
Day 4: The greatest book in the world
All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3:16–17 NASB
1. How can you be equipped by God?
2. What are the different uses of the Scriptures (God’s words in the Bible)?
1. How do you use Scripture in your life?
2. How has Scripture corrected or encouraged you?
3. Make a plan for studying or reading the Bible on a regular basis.
Sign up for A Season of Grief free daily email messages for encouragement, help, insights on the grief process, Scripture, prayers, and words of advice from people who have experienced the death of a loved one.
Day 5: Worship
Come, let us bow down in worship, let us kneel before the LORD our Maker. Psalm 95:6
1. What does it mean to “worship”?
2. What inspires you to worship God? (silence, songs, being out-of-doors)
1. How has music affected you during this time in your life? Which songs have been helpful to you in your healing?
2. Why is it good to worship with other people?
Help for the Journey: Week 5
Day 1: Reflecting on God’s creation
So my spirit grows faint within me; my heart within me is dismayed. I remember the days of long ago; I meditate on all your works and consider what your hands have done. I spread out my hands to you; my soul thirsts for you like a parched land. Psalm 143:4–6
1. What can you do when your spirit is faint or when your heart feels heavy?
2. How does it help you to meditate on God’s creation?
1. What are your favorite places in nature?
2. How does creation show something about the greatness of God?
Discover more practical ideas for moving forward in healing at a GriefShare group near you.
Day 2: Passing on your blessings
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. 2 Corinthians 1:3–4
1. How has God comforted you since the loss of your loved one?
2. According to the above Bible verse, what is one reason God has comforted you?
1. Describe a time when you have spoken to someone in grief (or another crisis) and shared words that were helpful to him or her.
2. Sometimes words are not what is needed. What actions of comfort can you pass on to another person?
Day 3: You can help someone else
Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the saints. Philemon 1:7
I long to see you so that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to make you strong—that is, that you and I may be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith. Romans 1:11–12
1. How can you encourage others?
2. Why do you need to spend time with other people?
1. Describe someone who has been a great encouragement to you.
2. Describe a time when you needed encouragement and did not receive it.
Day 4: Many hands make the load light
Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2
1. How can you fulfill the law of Christ?
2. What attitude should you take toward others?
1. You cannot help everyone, but you can help someone. Name some people you could help (by being a listening ear, by doing something for them, by giving a gift or a kind word, by volunteering your time).
2. Why do you need others?
Day 5: The golden rule
So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12
1. Rewrite the Golden Rule in your own words:
2. How is the Golden Rule proactive?
1. Describe what life would be like if everyone followed the Golden Rule.
2. If you go to church, how is your church a spiritual hospital?
Help for the Journey: Week 6
Day 1: Eternal life
Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.” Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.” Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” John 11:23–26
1. How does Jesus describe Himself?
2. According to the Bible, who goes to heaven and will live forever?
1. How has your faith grown during this time of grief?
2. What are your thoughts about heaven these days?
Want to learn more about what happens after death? At GriefShare, one of the 13 weekly sessions delves into what the Bible says about heaven and eternity.
Day 2: The reason for living
For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. Philippians 1:21
1. What was Paul’s view of death (Paul is the author of Philippians)?
2. How could he say that with such confidence?
1. How does living for Jesus prepare a person for facing death?*
2. How will death one day be gain to a person who is a Christian?
* God, What Is Going On? provides information on what it means to live for Jesus, which is the same as becoming a Christian.
Day 3: The wonders of heaven
And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Revelation 21:3–4
1. How close will you be to God in heaven?
2. What will be absent in heaven?
1. What part of this description of heaven do you like the most?
2. What things in this life will you not miss in heaven?
Day 4: A place prepared for you
Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. John 14:1–3
1. What can keep your heart from being troubled?
2. What has Jesus gone to do?
1. Jesus promised to return. How does this encourage you?
2. What is Jesus’ description of heaven?
Day 5: Are you ready for heaven?
Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. Matthew 25:34
1. If you have given God control of your life, you are now His child, His heir. What is the inheritance that He promises you?
2. If God has spent that long preparing His kingdom for you, how awesome do you think this kingdom is going to be?
1. Why will you never be bored in heaven?
2. Where can you learn more about heaven?
3. Are you ready for heaven? On what do you base this hope?
What now?
You have reached the end of the six-week study. We are glad you participated and trust it has helped on your healing journey.
By now you realize it will take even longer to complete the healing process, and we’d like to suggest some things to help you continue to move forward.
- Sign up to receive free email encouragement messages — “A Season of Grief” brings daily words of comfort and support, insights on the grief process, Scripture, prayers, and words of advice from people who have experienced a loved one’s death.
- Purchase Through a Season of Grief — a book of 365 devotions to comfort you and guide you on your journey of grief and healing. This is the book version of the daily email messages above. Purchase this book for yourself or to give to a family member or friend in grief.
- Participate in a GriefShare grief recovery support group — enter your postal code or city in our search engine to find a GriefShare group meeting near you!
- Review God, What Is Going On? — discover what it means to let God lead your life and to learn what there is to be hopeful about.